My MVP: Most Valuable Pinoy

My MVP Winner Luis Palaganas (left), Finalist Adrian Pellejera (right), with guru Alex Compton

Quick, name the current reality show with the largest cast of crushable manly men! If you said Survivor Philippines or Pinoy Fear Factor, you're wrong. My MVP: Most Valuable Pinoy, on the revamped TV5 network, is a search for the next basketball superstar in the Philippines, and boy, does it have a lot of men. The show began with hundreds of applicants, whittled down to a top 25 for training camp, then to a final team of 12. The hosts are Bayani Agbayani and Jason Webb, with Norman Black and other coaches playing key mentor roles. The first episodes capitalized on the comedy factor of not-hot, typically unathletic wannabes, but also showed some undeniably cute players. Choice personalities got mini-features on their life stories, and, at its most touching and human, My MVP plays like Hoop Dreams for an entire nation. It's hard not to root for all the Filipino men taking a chance -- for some, a second chance -- at pro glory. Now, that's what I call a reality contest.

Too bad the show doesn't seem to be aware of its sexy potential. There's a fly-on-the-wall journalistic approach to coverage that makes it look like news footage. It lacks the clean elegance and jolty sensationalism that can make people ogle and swoon at the exciting events and personalities, which is what the most addictive game shows offer. Like sitting on upper box B, you'd have to squint and keep from blinking to relish the muscles and sweat.

The one advantage of buying an established international franchise like Survivor is that the format has already been perfected. With shifty focus and too-loose story editing, My MVP is a sometimes messy viewing experience. I even forget what the guys are playing for, and what the rules are exactly. I didn't even know this week's challenge against PBA veterans was to be the last episode. (The show bows this week.) I should have promoted this show earlier, with this unsolicited advice: If My MVP stepped up to woo a gay audience plus women who are only into the game because of the boys, we would have new basketball idols right now with obsessive following. Hey, there were at least a couple of homoerotic jokes thrown by the boys during the show's run, and we all know sports is gay anyway. Let's hope for a second season.

GRADE: B-

Chalk Magazine - July 2008

One year ago, The Bakla Review debuted with a review of Chalk Magazine's annual UAAP/NCAA basketball special. Well, it's been a year, and the 2008 edition is here. There's even less basketball content in this one, if you can believe it, but somebody must have heard my gay prayers because this time, some boys are showing some serious skin. A six-page spread on select NCAA players (one for each participating school) is fan-tastic. The editors chose some actual hotties this time, and they're styled and photographed for a rough sexy appeal. Meanwhile, the boys from the other league, the UAAP, are dressed up to look stiff and boring, while everywhere else, it's the usual girly articles and shameless product placements. What those great but scant six pages really need to do is go forth and multiply. Maybe next year.

GRADE: B

Related Link:
Review of Chalk Magazine July 2007

Master Hair Wax Billboard

Sorry about the blurry picture. This giant billboard, spotted at the South Luzon Expressway, doesn't show skin, but it's all about sex anyway. The model's face -- who is he? -- is pure sex. His grin is seductive but playful. And erect hairstrands inserted through an inverted basketball hoop is also sex. I love it.

GRADE: B+

Related Link:
Model Sassan Shokouhi in Cosmo's Bachelor Bash

Sunkist Iced Tea - "Basketball"

Just how many commercials out there feature a finger running down a sweaty chest, ass-grabbing, chest-bumping, and three peeling off of basketball jerseys, one of which reveals a shaved armpit -- in 30 seconds?

This ad for Sunkist Iced Tea may or may not be homophobic, I'm still not sure. We're supposed to laugh at the idea of a basketball player (who's MVP, so he must be macho), suddenly turned "honest" after drinking the iced tea, and divulges -- in a flamboyant manner -- his real motivations for playing the game: the boys. The ad subverts stereotypes (that athletes, particularly in the macho sport of basketball, can be gay too) even as it feeds on them (they're in the closet and their "true" selves are sex-obsessed screaming faggots). The last reaction of the teammate on the right is point for discussion. However, the guys are hot, and the display of skin is delicious. Who are these terrific models? I didn't really find it funny, and I don't know if it effectively sells its product, but it has instantly become one of my favorite commercials for all time. I can't stop watching it.

GRADE: A-

Related Links:
Same ad on YouTube
Sunkist Iced Tea-"Movie"
Commercial Closet
Best Gay Commercials according to David Paul Robinson

Chalk Magazine - July 2007

Every year, Chalk, a lifestyle magazine aimed at the female college set, releases a college basketball issue -- or, more accurately, a UAAP/NCAA basketball issue, featuring the two most anticipated, corporate-sponsored, and revenue-earning leagues in the country. It's always a double flip cover issue. On one side, the UAAP. Turn it around and upside down, and it's the NCAA. The special is never really about the sport, but about the boys of the league. I await this issue every year.

And every year I'm disappointed. But I don't stop buying. The boys handpicked by the editors and staff aren't always the hottest, but that's a matter of taste and sharp scouting. Some of my favorite players have never been immortalized in these pages. However the most popular college crushes are usually in there, and there are always really cute ones. The issue stopped being wonderful in 2005, but the high point was the 2004 issue. It had more features on the boys with brief confessionals that make me think about sex and larger photos, including sweaty team pics, that make me think about sex. It contained basketball statistics and some sports analysis. Gone are those good stuff. The actual hoops-related content got leaner, in favor of more usual girly "kikay" features. What the mag retained through the years are the fashion spreads where the lads are dolled up in non-revealing, cumbersome clothing. In short, Chalk's idea of sexy is so Hello Kitty, you'd think they're doing this for the girls. Wait, they are. I'll keep buying this issue every year hoping they come to their senses.

GRADE: C-

Related Links:
Chalk Blog
Chalk Friendtser
Chalk Corporate
Chalk July 2007 as featured on the news
Sparksfire's Top College Hoop Hotties